ms. fresh fish


Bring it on back
March 21, 2016, 6:27 pm
Filed under: general | Tags: , , ,

My eyes hurt from crying. I imagine if I looked in a mirror, I’d look like a boxer… after the fight.

And as always lately, the trigger was a song.

When it came on a smile built on a two-decades’ old memory washed over my face. As the song went on, it felt like all that time, it had been prophetic.

My brother, until he was forever changed – yes, changed – by an autoimmune disease combined with a mental illness, was my brother, my father, my best friend, my biggest fan, my mentor and ally.

We used to dance around our house and sing. Like, sing. Our two favourites were Lisa Loeb’s “Stay” (he was totally Ethan Hawke in Reality Bites, as an aside) and the one below.

I hadn’t heard it in… forever. So, when it came on today on the way home from visiting him in hospital, where he’s been for almost 3 months, I was instantly overcome. I remember so vividly us yell-singing this song so damn theatrically around our living/dining room, that we would end up doubled over laughing.

But today, as the song progressed and then came to its beautiful ending, the smile evolved into tears. And I continued to bawl for the countless times I then replayed it.

Bring it on back, bro. Keep fighting and come back to us. We love you.

You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling

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A Very Canadian Day
July 1, 2015, 10:45 pm
Filed under: babies, family, The big picture | Tags: , , , , ,

My Mother-in-Law, Mama P/Nonna, came to visit for almost a week, and headed back home to Toronto on the train today. She doesn’t love travelling, so she was a bit nervous of the train – it was only her second train ride. Ever.

But oh so fitting that it was to be taken on Canada Day, given when her first train ride had taken place.

She was eight years old when she arrived in Halifax, Nova Scotia after what sounds like a gruelling three week boat trip from Italy with her Mom and two older brothers. When she arrived in Halifax, they boarded the train – for her first, and until today, last ride – to Toronto to reunite with her Dad and two of her three older brothers that she had not seen in years.

Since that time, she has built an incredible life with her husband and community in Canada, raising three amazing kids – one who works for the federal government, another a teacher and one who (officially!) owns a business, adoring her four grandchildren, supporting (and feeding) legions of family, friends and strangers including working with children with special needs for the last 25 years.

We’re all ever so thankful that her family took those voyages, so that Canada could call her its own.

image

Sending Nonna off

(Oh, and by the way, she got home safely and sounds like this train ride was much more enjoyable than her last one…)



Unexpected Similarities
November 12, 2014, 7:45 am
Filed under: babies, family, ottawa, Parenting, Restaurants, The big picture | Tags: , , , , , ,

Tb and I spent the day with (Great, to her) Nanny yesterday. Tb is now three, (Great) Nanny is now ninety. Woah on both fronts.

It’s always a far more pleasant experience to visit the Lord Lansdowne with only one twin, particularly the one who feels she’s an adult rather than a monkey seemingly on speed. (Guess which one is more fun at the park or out for a hike?) So, we were able to spend awhile together today, just the three of us.

I teared up watching them chat at their Kettleman’s table while I ordered our bagel delights. I love that I can leave them alone together while I run off to get something (read: go to the bathroom). We all excitedly watched the jets fly over the building after they passed over the Cenotaph and my grandmother talked about the war years.

As the morning, and then the afternoon, wore on, certain similarities between my companions could no longer escape my awareness.

  • Speed of getting from point A to B (spoiler alert: the speed is that which requires me to re-assess my own natural pace and allows me to take some (a lot of) time to re-assess whether I really need to always move as fast as I do – I decline to note the answer to that reflection)
  • Interest in abiding by the unwritten (probably written, let’s be honest) rules around Moments of SILENCE (As in, no interest. At all.)
  • Neither require my help, for anything. Apparently.
  • Neither are particularly interested in small talk, which works well for me as then I get to small talk for three!
  • Speed of eating one bagel, or 4/5 of a bagel (pic below is approximately 45 minutes since we’d arrived)Kettleman's
  • Both get very excited about new walkers, as discovered after the original broke while at lunch and required being replaced in a hurry. This is J “surprising” Nanny with her new walker, which she only gave up upon securing the old (broken) one, now in our trunk)

Nanny's New Walker

 What a lovely (and ridiculous) day.