ms. fresh fish


You should see someone. Seriously.
October 15, 2012, 2:57 pm
Filed under: general

Most people know that I’ve got a healthy dose of crazy going on. This, I contend, is primarily due to the fact that I openly talk about my crazy and the therapy that I’ve undergone to help cope with the crazy. Some people have responded to this with shock, but often enough, they surprise me with their own therapy journey.

It continues to confound me why therapy (in some form) is not a part of everybody’s health care regime. Seeing a family doctor is a given, but a therapist? Never! So what if it is the most complicated organ on the face of the earth that controls all of our behaviours, and therefore, our careers, relationships, health and that little thing called “happiness.” No biggie. I’LL OUTSMART IT. 

Here’s the thing about the noggin though, people: It wires itself to protect its carrier. It normalizes and rationalizes things so that you feel like you’re fine and you don’t go stirring things up.

I’ve long been fascinated with people’s reactions to my suggestions that they go see someone. Some people honestly think that they’re above it and would have nothing to learn, to which I respond: “So then why do therapists have therapists?” I try not to be offended by these folks, as implicit in that argument is that I’m too weak to sort it out myself. I don’t think they mean to do that though. 

Some people – and these are the ones that I have the utmost respect for – are just openly and plainly scared of its power. I get that. Totally. It’s daunting to open yourself up, make yourself vulnerable to a complete stranger about the most important parts of your life. What if they lead you to the conclusion that you want to quit your job, leave your wife, divorce your family? Any of these scenarios are very unlikely. What *is* likely is that you’ll learn to focus in on what’s important, identify what *truly* makes you happy, why you behave in certain ways that are less than constructive, and learn coping mechanisms for the things that you can’t – or are unable find the strength to – change.

I recently went to the Royal Ottawa Hospital’s “Leaders for Mental Health” breakfast, which was an impressive affair, bringing together hundreds of people, including Daniel Alfredsson. I was reminded of what courage it takes for people to seek help, and what courage it takes for people to talk about it. I now see those who’ve gone through the hard work of really looking at themselves and their lives with so much admiration and respect. Their strength is inspiring.

And so, I will leave you with something that I’m sure many of you have heard me say before: I’ve never met anyone in my entire life who wouldn’t benefit from a little therapy. Trust me, you won’t regret it.

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8 Comments so far
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Ah! I totally agree and you’ve expressed it just the way would if I were as articulate and succinct as you are. Not every time I go is easy, but I always come away with some little nugget about myself that I didn’t know before. And then I get to apply that buffet to real life, which I turn makes real life easier.
It’s brilliant. I doubt ill ever stop.

Comment by Marianna Annadanna

Recovering People Pleaser. Couldn’t have gotten there without therapy =)!

Comment by freshfish

We spend hundreds on spa treatments for the body. So what about a spa for the mind. Doesn’t it deserve some attention too?

J.

Comment by servingothersblog

I’ll be your campaign manager. Let’s do this!

Comment by freshfish

This is my favourite of your posts ever. And you’ve written some great ones. Sent it to my entire family. Bam! Thank you for being part of my journey into therapy, LB. xo

Comment by v

It’s an honour, my dear!! You were so inspiring going through it – not just your willingness to delve deep, but you’re commitment to ACTING to resolve and evolve. Your journey has been amazing to watch and I’m truly thankful that you shared it with me. I definitely had you in mind while I was writing it!!

Comment by freshfish

You have a point. I am not certain why I fought against going to a therapist for such a long time but I did. It wasn’t like I had never been before but this time it just seemed too much. I am back at a place where I think I may have to return and once again I am uncertain because it just feels like one more thing on my plate. Silly I suppose but it feels like a chore.

Comment by Jenn@Fox in the City

Makes sense – because it’s work. But the short-term effort pays off soon enough. If you can gather the energy and courage to make this first step, you’ll get the energy for the bigger steps. Also, awhile ago, I resigned myself to being a person who will be going to therapy on and off for the rest of my life. We can’t be “cured” from our brain changing, so we should all embrace going back in periodically.

Comment by freshfish




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