ms. fresh fish


Suggestion for the NHL
May 11, 2006, 2:46 am
Filed under: general

The thing is, they just don't wear suits well. The players, I mean.

If you recall, last week I found myself wondering if a particular player's** name translated into the word "wowzas" because he was so esthetically pleasing. But then, Wednesday evening, a gauntish (thanks thesaurus-kaili) man in an awkwardly worn suit was shown on tv walking towards a camera and I had to ask Marco who it was. "It's (him)" he replied. Just like that, the man falls from the list of "sweet" hockey players and onto the "other" list ("salty"?). But that was not to be the end of my rollercoaster affair with this player on this particular evening. While chatting on the phone for hours on end, images of hockey games danced in my head, er, on tv in front of me. Low and behold, there's an attractive guy stretching before the game that I catch myself staring at only to realize that it's frickin' him AGAIN! He's now safely back on the "sweet" list.

But he's not the only one who has this problem and it's not their fault. In fact, something tells me some of you out there already understand this phenomenon and have lived it. In an effort to try to put some sense to it however, I think it just comes down to the fact that they feel most comfortable and confident in hockey uniforms because that's been the one constant wardrobe their entire lives. And you know how it goes… when you feel confident, you look confident and then you look good (usually). Like the little bound feet, their bodies were just built for hockey uniforms (that is, for the record, the best analogy of all time).

At this point, it's only fair to also recognize the bias of the Canadian grrl inside me who has been conditioned (read: unwillingly) to get a wee bit weak in the knees at the sight of a man in a hockey uniform and furthermore, to be skeptical of the man in a suit (there are exceptions to this, however, and I think I'm beginning to come around), or a speedo (that one's legit).

And so NHL, whoever makes the players get all gussied up to look like kids wearing their dads' suits before the games, please do us a favour, and make them show up already dressed to play. In fact, any public appearances – ditch the suits, slap on the jerseys and definitely keep the helmets on. Please.

**This player shall remain nameless because a) if I focus on him personally, the more general point is lost… and it is a general point and b) I heart him and don't want him to get the wrong idea and give me a hard time when he's over for dinner next week.

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